There are so many instances where college drop outs have been more successful than the students who graduate out of college. The list includes billionaires like Bill Gates (founder of Microsoft), Paul Allen (co-founder of Microsoft) and several others including Steve Jobs (founder of Apple). If you think you have what it takes to accomplish what most graduates only dream of achieving, then it is very essential for you to drop out of college.
Treat this article as your “Bible” and follow it regularly and do not stop until you have finally managed to drop out of college.
Rule 1: Thou shall never attend class
The golden principle that one must follow on their path to failure is “Never attend class”. By not attending classes, one would be completely clueless about the portions covered in class, the schedule for assignments and tests, when home works and assignments are due.
Most classes have credit for attendance; hence by not attending classes you are losing credits and thereby reducing the chances for passing the subject. Even if you do miss a class due to miscellaneous reasons like illness, one must always keep in mind that neither to contact teachers for the cause of missed classes nor make up any quizzes or tests. And, even if you decide to go to class once in a while, one should attend it without any prior preparation.
Above all else, your failure will be certain.
Rule 2: Thou shall not study
Following the first rule is essential but one should not rely on this only. This brings us to second rule which is “Do not study”. Knowledge about a subject is considered to be the backbone for getting good grades. Hence, one should not study at all.
No importance what so ever should be given to home works or the lectures taught in the class. In this way, even if you decide to attend class once in a while, you are completely clueless about the subject matter taught.
Some people may argue that if not course materials, one should read magazines or general books. Do not let them trick you into reading all these book because by doing so it will boost your vocabulary. Before you know, you will be able to understand questions in quizzes and you may get them right. To avoid this under all circumstances, it is very crucial for one not to read ANYTHING.
Rule 3: Thou shall not pay attention in class
As already discussed, Rule 1 is considered to be a golden principle since it is one rule that will insure failure at all costs. However, if one is really desperate to attend classes, the following rule can come in handy. The third rule which can be considered as a substitute for rule 1 is “never pay attention in class”.
For what so ever reason, if you decide to go to class then you must undertake the responsibility of paying insignificant attention in class. If you are not concentrating on what the professor is saying, then there is nothing productive happening from your presence in class. You would be physically present in the class but mentally absent. This is equivalent to not attending class altogether. Hence, this would produce the same end result that is flunking out of the course.
Rule 4: Thou shall never practice
The next rule of essence is “Never study”. This is one rule that students can do with ease and has been mastered by most students since you have to do absolutely nothing. The rule can be justified by the following quote:
“Practice makes a man perfect, but nobody is perfect; so why practice?”
The above quote is self explanatory. It is the basis for the decision to flunk out of college, which is a wise decision indeed. However, there are certain scenarios where a student has to recite the number of study hour to a professor. Obviously, you can always falsify those hours and the professor would accept it as true.
But, for sincere students who do not wish to lie about the study hours, you must make sure that your study time takes place between two to five a.m. This is because your concentration would be at its minimal during these hours and anything that you are willing to study would hardly have any effect.
This implies that you would be able to notify to your teacher about your large number of study hours and would still be able to flunk in exams.
Rule 5: Thou shall pick up a mindless job
No studying leaves you with a lot of spare time and in order to avoid the craving for studying; you need to find yourself a full time job. Some people need a job because they cannot afford their education costs but even otherwise you are strongly encouraged to work.
Working would keep you completely preoccupied and you would have little or no time for studies. Thus, it is important for you to take up extra work shifts so that you can earn extra money and at the same time focus less on studies. Another really good benefit from doing a job while studying is you will have an assured job in spite of flunking out of college. Since you start earning a lot of money, you need to find out channels through which you can spend them.
Rule 6: Thou shall eat only junk food
Since the food in the university cafeteria is slightly expensive, there is always an option of spending most of the money you earned on food. You must have seen this quote often: “A healthy mind in a healthy body.” This implies that a person with a healthy diet would be more attentive than a person who only relies on junk food.
Improper diet plays a crucial role in keeping you out of focus. Eating a lot of sweet and fatty foods would result in an unhealthy mind and you would lack the enthusiasm to study or work. During exams it would be very difficult for you to concentrate and be able to grasp the materials, resulting in an easy failure.
Rule 7: Thou shall get wasted every single day
Last but not the least; college life is all about fun. If you want to hit two birds with one stone, then get drunk! Well, the first benefit is that you get to fulfill your need to socialize and secondly you are making your way out of college clearer. By drinking I don’t mean an occasional glass but rather regular excessive consumption.
Since you are thoroughly drunk most of the time, missing classes should not be a problem at all as most of the day times are passed by constant hangovers. This habit should be adapted early in college and so how the alcohol turns into a magic potion!
Flunking out of college takes a bit of time and classical know- how to get on the blundering road. Everyone looks forward to flunking out of college, but only the few brave souls who are willing to do the unthinkable tasks present in this essay manage to surpass all the hurdles and FLUNK out of college.
